The Best Decision I Made All Year: Returning to My Personal Standards

There’s a moment in every leader’s journey where you look around and realize you’ve been living at a fraction of your own standard — not because you lost it, but because life pulled you into environments that couldn’t hold it.

And then one day, you stop.

You look at the version of yourself you’ve been operating as.

And you remember who you actually are.

That was the best decision I made this year:

I returned to my own standards.

Not the standards that made other people comfortable.

Not the standards I lowered to survive certain rooms.

Not the standards I adjusted to accommodate misalignment.

Not the standards shaped by other people’s expectations.

My standards.

The standards that built my career.

The standards that protected my integrity.

The standards that shaped my work ethic, my discernment, my leadership identity.

The standards that I never should’ve negotiated in the first place.

Here’s the truth most people avoid:

You don’t lose yourself in a single moment.

You lose yourself in small concessions.

Tiny compromises.

Silent adjustments.

Little shifts that feel harmless… until they aren’t.

Returning to my standards required me to:

1. Be honest about where I’d abandoned myself.

Not in dramatic ways — in subtle ones.

Over-explaining.

Overworking.

Over-functioning.

Over-extending.

Pretending “fine” was enough when I’ve never been a “fine” kind of person.

2. Reclaim the quality of my “yes.”

Standards aren’t about who you shut out.

They’re about who — and what — you let IN.

Your “yes” is where your life takes shape.

Change your yes, change your direction.

3. Recalibrate my expectations of myself — upward.

Not in pressure.

Not in perfectionism.

But in truth.

In remembering that I’ve never done average work, lived an average life, or been an average leader.

So why accept standards that reflect anything less?

4. Admit that lowering my standards was a survival tactic, not a solution.

And survival mode never produces your best thinking.

It produces compliance.

It produces caution.

It produces diminished versions of brilliance.

But when you return to your standards?

Your world expands.

Your ideas sharpen.

Your energy steadies.

Your pace becomes intentional.

Your confidence stops needing validation.

Your clarity stops needing permission.

5. Accept that not everyone can stay when you rise back to who you are.

Returning to your standards is like raising the floor of your life.

Some things — and some people — simply won’t reach it.

And that is not a failure.

That is filtration.

The best decision I made this year was remembering that my standards aren’t obstacles, they’re instructions.

They teach people how to treat me.

They guide my choices.

They protect my peace.

They elevate my presence.

They keep me aligned with the version of myself I refuse to lose again.

This year required me to return to my personal standards without apology or hesitation.

Returning to my own standards wasn’t a reset.

It was a return.

A return to truth.

A return to alignment.

A return to a level of integrity I refuse to negotiate.

A return to the version of me that doesn’t bend to fit into small places.

And, from here on out, anything that cannot rise to meet those standards simply won’t rise with me.